Mother Goose Rhymes for War Purposes

1918

Columbia, Mo., April 9. — Mother Goose is going to "do her bit" to help win the war. Several of the most renowned nursery rhymes have been adapted to war purposes by G. F. Nardin, graduate of the University of Missouri, and are being illustrated by posters made by students of the Art Department of the university. Two of his rewritten rhymes follow:

Kaiser Bill went up the hill.
To whip the American nation;
Bill fell down and lost his crown.
He stuck on conservation.

Sing a song of thrift stamps,
War bread made of rye
Saving, too, the shortening,
We used to use in pie
Weeping all the porkless days.
And eating meatless meals
It makes a lot of difference,
The way a fellow feels.

Patriotic posters, designed at the university, decorate all Columbia.

—The Ada Weekly News, Ada, Oklahoma, April 11, 1918, page 2.

The Five Pigs

This Pig the eldest of the five
Who with their Mother dwelt,
And he a donkey used to drive,
That had a shaggy pelt.

As to the town he wended slow
All on a market day,
The donkey would no further go,
But sat him down to bray.

So Piggy took the harness off
That aggravating elf,
Dismiss'd him with a withering scoff
And drew the cart himself.

The second Pig a varlet fat,
Remained at home and took
Delight in dressing up the cat
To imitate the cook.

And sometimes, when his Mother went
Abroad to see her kin,
The varlet would indulge his bent,
By drinking up her gin.

In consequence he lay half-dead,
One evening in October,
When she cold water on his head
Poured until he was sober.

The third Pig always had roast beef
On Sunday for his dinner.
He never caused his Mother grief
Like the last mentioned sinner.

Brave as a lion, too, was he;
One day he soundly thrashed
A Bully-Pig who brutally
A small Pig's hat had smashed.

And then the little Pig he led
Away from that Pig vile,
And purchased for his ill-used head
A hat of recent style.

The fourth Pig through his whole career
No roast beef ever had.
In books he would not persevere,
Which made his Mother sad.

All day about the streets went he,
And scattered orange-peel,
Upsetting old pigs frequently,
Who on it set a heel.

Until a Police-Pig, Number Two,
Him into a prison cast,
And so this flagrant Pig unto,
A bad end came at last.

And now my pen (my pig-pen?)
Unto the fifth Pig comes,
He on the banjo loved to play,
And partial was to drums.

A linguist excellent was he,
Likewise, and when addressed,
In French, would promptly say, "Wee! wee!"
With manners self-possessed.

--The Boyd Smith Mother Goose

(This little pig went to market,
This little pig stayed home.
This little pig had roast beef,
This little pig had none.
This little pig went wee-wee-wee
all the way home.)

(This little piggie went to market,
This little piggie stayed home.
This little piggie had roast beef,
This little piggie had none.
This little piggie went wee-wee-wee
all the way home.)