Lord Russell's Ruse

1895

The lord chief justice was too smart for the juryman who sought to be excused from serving. "On what ground?" asked his lordship. The man approached with his hand to his ear and said, "I'm deaf, my lord, and cannot bear the evidence." "You can go," said Lord Russell in a whisper. "Thank you, my lord," replied the juryman, taken off his guard, but the learned judge had not finished his sentence, and he sternly added, "into the box and do your duty!" The man quailed and obeyed in some confusion at the failure of his ruse. — Westminster Budget.


An Insult

Miss Beans (of Boston, visiting in Chicago) — Mamma, that Mr. Porkingham insulted me last night, and I shall never speak to him again!
Mamma — How, my child?
Miss B. — He asked me if we were from New York. — Detroit Free Press.


Pompeiian Sculptor

In the house of a Pompeiian sculptor were found 32 mallets, 15 compasses, 3 levers, several chisels, together with jacks for raising blocks and nearly 30 statues and busts, in every stage of manufacture.


Beavers

The tail of a beaver is a regular trowel and is used as such.

Jury Acquits Girl On Slaying Charge

1920 (actually happened in 1919)

16-Year-Old Defendant Plans To Resume School

Clara Bartel's Plea That She Slew Father in Family Defense Wins Freedom

DOYLESTOWN, Pa. — The plea of Clara Bartel, the 16-year-old girl accused of the murder of her father, Charles Bartel, that she had killed him in defending the lives of her mother and her sisters resulted in her acquittal by a jury here after only 20 minutes' deliberation.

The defendant burst into tears when the foreman of the jury announced the verdict. She swayed as if about to fall, and Mrs. Charles R. Nightingale, the probation officer who has taken care of her since her arrest, caught her in her arms. Then the crowd in the courtroom surged about her, showering her with congratulations.

Clara threw her arms about J. Hibbs Buckman, her chief attorney, and sobbed on his shoulder.

"Oh, I am so glad," she said. "Now I can help take care of mother."

Warns Against Sympathy

Judge William C. Ryan occupied thirty-five minutes in his charge to the jury.

"We have all been moved by the pathos of this case and story of the dark tragedy," said the court. "But it is your duty to render a verdict unaffected by the sympathy for this defendant of tender [years.] If she acted in [self-]defense or in defense of her mother, she would not be guilty of this offense."

"I shot my father. I had to do it to save us all."

That was the girl's first statement as she took the stand in her own defense at her trial for the murder of her father at their home near Edgewood, Bucks County, on the morning of August 22.

Three jurors wept openly as the girl told her story of a father who, she averred, abused her mother, herself and the other small children.

Bartel's aged mother, Mrs. Amelia Bartel, 81 years old, said Clara told her: "Grandma, I killed him. I had to do it to save us."

Says Father Beat Her

Under direct examination she told of finding a bundle of letters written by another woman to her father hidden in the peak of the barn. She testified that she read the letters and kept them for several days and finally showed them to her mother. For this her father beat her, she said.

After she had been given a medal for selling Liberty Bonds, she said, her father said he was "going to kill her" and expressed the hope that "they sink every d—n American." She also told of several instances when Bartel had threatened to kill her and her mother.

One night, she said, her father ordered her to go out into the barnyard and find a stick with which he drove his hogs. She told of his beating her mother the morning of the shooting and also chasing her downstairs, shouting, "I am going to kill the whole d—n lot of you and do it now!" She said he went to the place where the guns were usually kept, but they were not there. Then, she said, she ran into another room and got a shotgun and, closing her eyes, pointed it at her father, not knowing it was loaded. The gun was discharged and the shot tore thru her father's body.

--The Saturday Blade, Chicago, Jan. 3, 1920, p. 3.

Note: Two words in brackets are supplied because of breaks in the paper and so they're missing. Of course they're obvious to the context.

Spelling Stuck the Jury

1914

Point of Information They Wanted Involved No Great Legal Knowledge, If Judge Had It

Here is one that was told at a tea given by Miss Geraldine Farrar, the singer, when one of the party referred to the judiciary and the peculiar cases that frequently come before the courts:

"Some time ago there was a homicide case in a western court in which there was considerable doubt as to the guilt of the accused. The trial judge seemed to share the popular belief.

" 'Gentlemen of the jury,' said he, in concluding his charge, 'if the evidence, in your minds, shows that pneumonia was the cause of the man's death, you cannot convict the prisoner.'

"Whereat the jury retired and in about ten minutes the constable returned and presented himself before the judge.

" 'Your honor.' he remarked, "the gentleman of the jury want some in- formation.'

" 'On what point of evidence?' asked the judge.

" 'None, judge,' was the rejoinder of the constable. 'They want to know how to spell "pneumonia,"' " — Philadelphia Telegraph.