The Blind Smoker's Cigar

1901

We are often told that a man who is smoking in the dark would be unable to tell whether his cigar were alight or no unless he could see the red glow at the end of it. So, too, a man with his eyes shut would have great difficulty in telling whether he were drinking port or sherry. Now, as I have been blind for upward of 30 years I am unluckily somewhat fairly qualified to contest the validity of this statement. I was a smoker for 20 years before my infirmity crept upon me, and I am smoking even now as I dictate this letter. In fact, I have smoked all my life.

To say that I do not know whether my cigar is alight or no because I cannot see either the smoke or the red glow at the end of the weed is simply absurd. The taste alone is sufficient to tell me accurately. The one is infinitely pleasurable and flavorable and the other exceedingly disagreeable and objectionable. Tongue, palate and odor are incontrovertible testifiers. I grant that the pleasure of smoking is lessened by the absence of the sight of the smoke, but only slightly, and to assert that I do not know whether I am smoking or not is as much as to say I do not know whether I am standing on my head or my heels. — Saturday Review.

Feared Burial in Trance

1905

Unhappy Existence Led by Victim of Peculiar Disease

"In one of my voyages from Cape Town to England," writes a traveler, "I shared my cabin with a peculiar man, whose name was Lazarus. He made me promise that if he should die during the voyage I would prevent his burial at sea. He said that on a previous voyage he had fallen sick and was taken for dead and put into a sack for burial.

"A quartermaster had been put on to watch the body until it was time for the funeral. When the burial party arrived, the quartermaster informed the captain that he thought the body had moved in the sack. The sack was opened and Lazarus eventually came to life again.

"Such was the story Lazarus told me. Lazarus was a thin man, with a sallow face. He had an enormous appetite and appeared at every meal, to which he devoted his whole energies. The good feeling only seemed to add to his corpse-like appearance.

"One evening, sure enough, when we were about half way to our voyage's end, he apparently died again. The doctors took him in charge this time, however, and he came out of his trance without any shotted-sack episode. He was met at the London docks by a number of relatives and friends, all of whom looked as if they might be suffering from the same complaint."



One of Life's Perplexities

Why People Admire Something Producer Thinks Little Of

He had two lectures. One was dignified, noble, grand, well-pleasing to himself. The other was common, simple, earnest, popular, but thought little of by himself. One of the perplexities of his life was this: Why should the people admire something that he thought little of, and think little of something which he thought so much of? Some thoughts and sermons are for those who create them, and should be kept in a sealed case in the owner's private laboratory. — Earl M. Pratt in "Short Talks."

Parry a Compliment, Accept One, Give Your Attention

1902

Accept One Always, but Never Take It Seriously

The famous Mme. Recamier said that she always found two words sufficed to make her guests seem welcome. Upon their arrival she exclaimed, "At last!" and when they took their leave she said, "Already?" If taken literally, we should deprecate the flattery. Flattery is insincere praise and wrongs him that gives and him that takes. It is sometimes kinder to accept a compliment than to parry it.

One may say "Thank you, it is pleasant to be seen through such kind (or partial) eyes," or perhaps, "It is a comfort to know that friendship is partly blind as well as the mythological boy," or any nonsense that serves to show that one appreciates the spirit that prompted the kind expression, however wide the truth.

The frequent repetition of the name of the person addressed h olds a subtle compliment, implying more complete concentration on the speaker's thought upon his or her personality.

De Quincy says: "More will be done for the benefit of conversation by the simple magic of good manners than by all varieties of intellectual power."

It is the sympathetic and responsive listeners that call forth the best efforts of a talker. For such are reserved his choicest stories, his finest thoughts.

A ready smile acts as inspiration, and interest shown in the conversation of others stimulates and vivifies their thoughts.

To a good listener the diffident will say what they think, and the verbose will think what they say.

There is nothing more trying than to find that one's conversation is receiving but a divided attention and nothing more rude than for a person to pick up a book or paper and look over it while pretending to listen to what one is saying. — New York Herald.