Kaiser Wilhelm's Wonderful Tablecloth

1895

The German emperor is possessed of a remarkable tablecloth, which was presented to him upon the occasion of his wedding by the women of Schleswig and Holstein. Woven into its texture are a great number of proverbs and mottoes. These had become obliterated by use. The emperor, however, being desirous of having the words rendered readable, caused the cloth to be sent to Berlin, where it has been carefully cleaned. The following are a few of the proverbs to be found upon it:

"Willst thou here have spass (fun), be thou careful with thy glass," "Endurance gives strength that lasts," "Do not believe all you hear, do not say all you know, do not do all you would like," "Always hope, never fear," "Important to despise the past, well and maturely to contemplate the future, well to arrange the present, and thus a peaceful life is spent," "I await fortune according to my idea," "Heart seeks heart everywhere," "Wisdom govern, peace reign, love dwell, labor act, honor grace." — Philadelphia Record.

A Street Incident and Royalty

1896

A significant circumstance occurred during a visit of the Emperor of Germany to England. The kaiser was for one day the guest of the lord mayor, and the city of London received him and several of the queen's children on that day.

The old city was splendidly decorated, and set for a great public function. The streets from Buckingham palace to the lord mayor's mansion were lined with infantry and cavalry, back of whom was a solid mass of people.

Between these lines the royal carriages slowly passed. They moved in almost absolute silence, save for the perfunctory salutes of the soldiery. The queen was not present, and for mere royalty as royalty, there was apparently no popular feeling save that of curiosity.

When, however, the carriage of the Princess of Wales appeared, and her sweet, kind face was seen, the applause grew enthusiastic. Suddenly a burst of cheers was heard, as a low, black wagon came swiftly down the thronged street. It was the ambulance of a hospital, which has precedence everywhere, carrying some wounded man to receive succor. The crowd paid homage to charity in a sincere though inappropriate fashion.

In it was a hint which the scions of the ruling families of Europe present should have understood. Queen Victoria knows that her people pay allegiance to her more as a wise, good woman, wife and mother than as one of the House of Hanover.

"The divinity which doth hedge a king" must now have its bases in humanity and personal respect rather than in descent or etiquette.


Standardize the Bike

A proposition has been made recently by bicycle riders to several agents and manufacturers of bicycles that the manufacturers get together in a convention and agree to reduce numerous parts of their different machines to standard proportions.

Attila, King of The Huns

1915

Warrior-Barbarian Who Ravaged a Great Part of Europe in the Fifth Century

"Like the Huns under Attila" is a phrase which is on everybody's lips at the present time. Yet comparatively few people know by whom it was first used, or understand the reference.

It was with these words that the Kaiser bid farewell to his troops when they were dispatched to China to help put down the Boxer rising: "Gain a reputation like the Huns under Attila," he told them, says London Tit-Bits. The significance of the advice will be appreciated when it is realized that Attila was a barbaric chief whose ravages in Europe about the beginning of the fifth century gained for him the name of "the Scourge of God."

The leader of countless hordes of Huns, who were a Mongol race which crossed the Volga and struck terror into Europe, he was regarded by his men with superstitious reverence and by Christendom with superstitious dread. Among the acts which were committed by his direction were the following:

Bleda, his brother and co-chieftain, put to death.

All the countries between the Black sea and the Mediterranean devastated and pillaged.

Thrace, Macedon and Greece overrun, and 70 flourishing cities devastated.

Several cities in Italy razed to the ground and their inhabitants put to the sword.

Conquered peoples either killed or forced to follow in his train as prisoners.

Yet for all this ruthlessness Attila was a magnificent soldier and a striking personality. He was induced to spare Rome from destruction by the personal mediation of Pope Leo I, who is said to have subdued his ferocity into awe by the apostolic majesty of his mien. This deliverance was regarded as a miracle by the affrighted Romans, and old chroniclers relate that the Apostles Peter and Paul appeared in Attila's camp and changed his purpose.

Attila died on the night of his marriage with the beautiful Hilda — possibly by her hand. His death spread consternation through the host of Huns, who cut themselves with knives, shaved their heads and then prepared to celebrate the funeral rites of their king.

His body was placed in three coffins — the first of gold, the second of silver and the third of iron. The caparisons of his horses with his arms and ornaments were buried with him, while the captives employed to make his grave were all put to death so that none might betray the last resting place of Attila, king of the Huns.

Note: In World War I reporting, the Germans were frequently called the "Huns."

The Kaiser's Voice

1906

His Words Preserved on First Permanent Roll in Phonetic Archives

One of the novelties of the last few years is the establishment of phonetic archives, in which the voices of noteworthy persons are to be preserved.

The first record actually taken for such a permanent archive in America was that of a European. Through the American Ambassador Charlemagne Tower, I applied for a "record of the voice of the German emperor, for preservation in durable material in Harvard University, the National Museum at Washington, and the Library of Congress at Washington. The record is to be kept as a historical document for posterity. The Phonetic Archives at the institutions mentioned are to include records from such persons as will presumably have permanent historical interest for America. The importance of the undertaking can be estimated by considering the present value of voice records by Demosthenes, Shakespeare, or Emperor William the Great."

The Emperor consented, and the apparatus was set up in the palace. I asked for four records, one for each of the institutions mentioned and one for my own scientific investigation. The Emperor, however, made only two records, designating one for Harvard University and the other for other purposes. The two records were made by a phonograph (with specially selected recorders) on wax cylinders. Such cylinders are of no permanent value, because they are often injured by mold, and sooner or later they always crack, owing to changes in temperature.

From each original "master record" a metal matrix was made by coating it with graphite and then galvanoplating it. The wax master record was then removed (being destroyed in the process), leaving a mold from which "positives" — that is copies of the original — could be cast in a hard shellac composition and in celluloid. Some casts were also made in wax, and new metal matrices were made from these. In this manner the following material was obtained: (1) A metal matrix and positive of Record No. 1, deposited in the National Museum at Washington; (2) a similar set of Record No. 1, deposited in the Congressional Library at Washington; (3) a similar set of Record No. 2, deposited in Harvard University; (4) a complete set for both records (a metal matrix and a positive of each), which I presented to the Emperor; and (5) a reserve set of both. These are the only records of the German Emperor's voice which exist at the present time. — The Century.

Mother Goose Rhymes for War Purposes

1918

Columbia, Mo., April 9. — Mother Goose is going to "do her bit" to help win the war. Several of the most renowned nursery rhymes have been adapted to war purposes by G. F. Nardin, graduate of the University of Missouri, and are being illustrated by posters made by students of the Art Department of the university. Two of his rewritten rhymes follow:

Kaiser Bill went up the hill.
To whip the American nation;
Bill fell down and lost his crown.
He stuck on conservation.

Sing a song of thrift stamps,
War bread made of rye
Saving, too, the shortening,
We used to use in pie
Weeping all the porkless days.
And eating meatless meals
It makes a lot of difference,
The way a fellow feels.

Patriotic posters, designed at the university, decorate all Columbia.

—The Ada Weekly News, Ada, Oklahoma, April 11, 1918, page 2.

Will Dearly Pay

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Will Dearly Pay

Who caused this world-wide grief and woe
The Kaiser.
Who speaks of "Me und Gott?" you know --
The Kaiser.
Encouraged murder and abuse,
Who turned the baby killers loose,
Without reason or excuse?
The Kaiser.

Who paid no heed to Uncle Sam?
The Kaiser.
And showed he did not care a damn?
The Kaiser.
Who drowned our women, children, too,
While sailing on the ocean blue,
And riddled life boats through and through?
The Kaiser.

Who has his spies on every hand?
The Kaiser.
To boost and laud the Fatherland?
The Kaiser.
Though glad to reach his country's shore,
At heart they're loyal to the core
To that damned despot they adore,
The Kaiser.

Who started out the world to boss?
The Kaiser.
And who received the double-cross?
The Kaiser.
Who boasted of his super-men
And had the date all settled when
In Paris he would dine at ten?
The Kaiser.

Whose brutal methods shocked the world?
The Kaiser.
And who the pirate's flag unfurled?
The Kaiser.
Who always will regret the day
He roused the giant U. S. A.
And for his crimes will dearly pay?
The Kaiser.

-- Thomas H. West.

--The Iowa Unionist, Des Moines, Iowa, February 14, 1918, page 30.