Pop Big Pipe

1895

The Queer Will of a Famous Dutch Smoker Who Died at Ninety-eight.

In its discussion of the question whether it is injurious to smoke tobacco the Cleveland Plain Dealer recalls the history of Mynheer Van Klaes, a famous old merchant in Holland, who was such an inveterate smoker that he was nicknamed "Pop Big Pipe." He made a large fortune in the India trade and built a mansion near Rotterdam, in which he collected every imaginable kind of pipe. It was said that he smoked 150 grains of tobacco every day and died at the age of 98 years. In making his will, after bequeathing to his relatives, friends and charities a large proportion of his estate, he added the following clause:

"I wish every smoker in the kingdom to be invited to my funeral in every way possible, by letter, circular and advertisement. Every smoker who takes advantage of the invitation shall receive as a present ten pounds of tobacco and two pipes, on which shall be engraved my name, my crest and the date of my birth. The poor of the neighborhood who accompany my bier shall receive every year on the anniversary of my death a large package of tobacco. I make the condition that all those who assist at my funeral, if they wish to partake of the benefits of my will, must smoke without interruption during the entire ceremony. My body shall be placed in a coffin lined throughout with the wood of my old Havana cigar boxes. At the foot of the coffin shall be placed a box of French tobacco and a package of our old Dutch tobacco. At my side place my favorite pipe and a box of matches, for one never knows what may happen. When the bier rests in the vault, all the persons in the funeral procession are requested to cast upon it the ashes of their pipes as they pass it on their departure from the grounds."

It is said that Van Klaes, on the day that he made this eccentric will, summoned a notary who was also a notable smoker and said to him: "Fill my pipe and yours. I am going to die." He then dictated the will and died. The Plain Dealer ironically observes that crusaders against the use of tobacco will find in this striking instance little support for their claim that smoking is disastrous to the human system. Of course it may be argued that if he had limited his indulgence to 100 grams a day he might have lived to the advanced age of 120 instead of being cut off at 98.

Russian Ignorance

1895

Somebody was speaking before Count de Mitkiewicz of the ignorance which prevails among the lower classes in Russia.

"Ah, yes, that is very true," said he, "and it reminds me of a letter I had from a friend in St. Petersburg. It was written just at the time when the late czar's death was first rumored. My friend approached a private soldier in the street and asked him if he were sorry about the emperor's death. The soldier saluted.

" 'My lord,' he said, 'I have not yet received my orders!' " — Washington Post.



Virginia Slims

The young women sent out as wives for the Virginia colonists in 1620 brought from 120 to 160 pounds of tobacco apiece, with tobacco being worth 3 shillings a pound.

Dukes Mixture Tobacco (1895 Advertisement)

—The Long Island Farmer, Jamaica, NY, Jan. 25, 1895, p. 3.

Few Old Signs Left

1920

Many of the familiar trade signs used to advertise business enterprises have been discarded entirely in the onward sweep of advertising progress or displaced by more or less artistic displays of paint and electric lights.

One of the most common of the oldtimers that has vanished, says the New York Sun, was the wooden Indian, which kept its silent, stolid vigil beside the door of the tobacconist. The significant boot that once was suspended over the shop of the repairer of boots and shoes is also only a memory. So are the anvil hanging above the entrance to the blacksmith's shop and the horse's heads over livery-men's doorways.

The origin of the cigar store Indian dates back to Sir Walter Raleigh and his English settlers in our sunny South. These fortune seekers, visiting the unseen New World in the seventeenth century, and for the first time in the history of the white race learning the use of the tobacco weed from the North American Indian, symbolized this industry by the red man's imposing figure.

—The Saturday Blade, Chicago, Jan. 3, 1920, p. 6.

Pioneer Was Smoker More Than Century

March 1920

NEWTON, Kan. — James Owens, a pioneer of Newton, has received news of the death of his grandfather, John Owens, of Mississippi, said to have been the oldest man in that state. He was 114 years old, Mr. Owens said.

"My grandfather was a habitual user of tobacco for more than 100 years," said Mr. Owens. "He used to take pride in declaring that he never had taken a dose of medicine in his life. Although stout and healthy, he was small and weighed not more than 130 pounds."

What German Soldiers Want for Christmas

1915

The Berliner Tageblatt has published the replies of the various German armies to its inquiry of what the soldier boys would like to have sent them for Christmas.

Following is a summary of what the soldiers ask for:

Army of the Crown Prince: Red wine, cigars, cigarettes, smoking tobacco, canned milk, sewing materials, chocolate and cheese.

Army of Von Hindenburg: Honey cakes, herring, preserves, mitts, mufflers, ladies' muffs, sewing material, chocolates, mouth harmonicas, pocketknives.

Army of Mackensen: Sausage, lard or butter, dried fruits, chocolates, smoked fish, accordions or harmonicas. No woolen goods.

Army of Gallwitz: Cigars, cigarettes, chocolates, soap, sardines, fish, preserves, sewing materials, darning needles and wool, any kind of musical instrument, picture books and comic papers.

Army of Loewenfeld: Cigars, cigarettes, smoking tobacco, chocolates, stockings, handkerchiefs, canned milk.

Army of Von Kooster: Stockings, mitts, mufflers, towels, handkerchiefs, soap, chocolates, pickled meats, wine, beer, electric pocket lamps, pocketknives, funny papers.

The list offers variety for all tastes and purses.

Truthful Children

1900

Children are naturally truthful. Nature does not lie. Let nothing be done to alter this happy disposition. Cultivate in them the love of truth, candor, and the confession of error.

It is lamentable to think what fearful falsehoods are uttered to deter children, to keep them quiet, or to make them obedient. Threats of being taken by old men, and black men, and other like terrors, are resorted to by ignorant and foolish servants to frighten them, and make them lie still in bed. It is ascertained that death, fits, idiocy, or insanity have been the consequences of such inhumanity.

But, setting aside the probable chance of such calamities, there are other certain results. If the child discovers the falsehoods practiced upon him, he becomes boldly indifferent to the threats, is more disobedient and willful than ever, disbelieves all that is said to him, and, finding no respect for truth in others, has no regard for it himself.

Firmness in adhering to promises, or any particular line of discipline in relation to children, is of first importance.


Japan Consumes Much Rice

Japan is the largest consumer of rice in the world, the average being 300 pounds a person a year. The Americans use but four pounds per capita. Belgium uses more tobacco in proportion, than any other country, about 110 ounces per capita yearly, while Italy uses only twenty-two ounces.

Some Good About All Races

1900

"The Bright Side of Humanity," a new book by Dr. Edward Leigh Pell, is said to be the first serious attempt that has ever been made to present the characteristic noble traits of all races. In the preparation of his book Dr. Pell examined one thousand works of travel and although all of them set forth with considerable detail the vices and disagreeable traits of the people which they profess to describe, only two hundred dwelt at any length on their virtues. To supply the compensatory high lights in these dark pictures was a happy thought and must have been a pleasant task.


A Little of Everything

A Chicago tobacconist hands every cigarette purchaser a neighboring undertaker's card.

In the Black forest district of Germany are 1,400 master clockmakers and 6,000 workmen.

A church bell has an empty head and a long tongue, but it is discreet enough not to speak until tolled.

The sultan has forbidden the Turkish war department to use balloons or carrier-pigeons for army purposes.

A French naturalist asserts that nightingales devour the drones of a beehive, and never attack the workers.

A mint is to be established in Canada for the coinage of gold. Heretofore the coining of the metallic currency has been done in England.

An official map of Vesuvius on a scale of one in ten thousand has just been issued, being the first since 1876. A new plan in relief of the cone has also been made.

What Alaskan Indians Smoke

1910

Seattle, Wash. — How would you enjoy a pipeful of wood shavings saturated with a strong solution of pepper as an after dinner smoke? This is the strange substitute used for tobacco by Indians along the Alaska coast. Their mouths are often made raw by the practice, and the eyesight of many is affected by the strong fumes.

It is no uncommon practice among farmers to smoke the leaves of the tomato and potato plants. While both these plants contain a narcotic poison, the smoking of leaves in moderation is harmless. Excessive use, though, produces a heavy stupor, from which the smoker awakes with a terrific headache and a feeling of utter exhaustion. Insanity and suicide have often been caused by the immoderate use of these two weeds. Rhubarb, beet and even garden sage leaves are all smoked by farmers, and are perhaps the least harmful of substitutes for tobacco.


Turtle Asphyxiates Chicks

South Norwalk, Conn. — Funeral services for 100 chickens and three pigs were conducted behind the barn of Herman Jacobs and a snapping turtle that endeavored to qualify as a gas meter inspector is being fattened for slaughter as the result.

Jacobs caught the turtle some time ago and tied it to a stake in the back yard. The turtle broke loose and made for the gas meter in the barn. In his investigations he bit off the gas pipe close to the meter and the chickens and pigs were asphyxiated. Two farmhands who endeavored to rescue the unfortunates were made ill by the fumes.

Smuggling in Bustles

1888

It will soon be unsafe for a lady to go on board a steamboat adorned with the dorsal embellishment of the bustle.

From its first appearance the smuggler seems to have marked the dress-improver for his own, and in particular he has been struck by its advantages as a receptacle for contraband tobacco. Hitherto, however, this abuse of beauty's weapons has been confined to ports which the nobility and gentry do not frequent in large numbers.

But on Monday two aristocratic looking damsels, landing at Queenstown, were discovered (by the courteous instrumentality of a female searcher) to owe their "improvement" solely to Cavendish tobacco. It is a sad state of things when an American belle, in full panoply, can not land on our shores without an inhospitable summons to show "what she has got there."

For your general profit and instruction, ladies, mark what happened to the above adventurous maidens. Amidst the great bustle of the custom-house they left the garments of that name behind, as well as the tobacco and its treble value in current coin. — London Life.

An Old Man's Leap to Death — A Thrilling Suicide

1878

An Old Man's Leap to Death

A thrilling suicide took place one forenoon recently at St. Louis, an unhappy mortal leaping from the railing of the great bridge to the water, 110 feet below, meeting instant death.

A few moments previous to the occurrence the man started across from the eastern shore, leaving a letter in the hands of the ticket-seller on the other side addressed to a friend in East St. Louis, in which he deplored the circumstances which led to the suicide, and gave directions to be made of the few effects he left behind.

After leaving the ticket office on the other side, he pursued his way to the center span of the bridge, and one of the watchmen on the bridge saw him looking down into the swift current below with an abstracted air, as though undecided what course to pursue. But the watchman, never dreaming that he contemplated suicide, paid no special attention to him. Suddenly he divested himself of his outer apparel, coat and vest, and hastily climbing over the railing, he cast one imploring look upward, his lips moving as if in prayer, and then made the fatal leap into eternity.

Before the watchman, who was hastening toward him, could do anything to prevent the terrible fate that awaited the poor fellow, his body, as he made the frightful leap, was seen shooting through the air, and finally it was lost to sight beneath the muddy waters. One of the ferry-boats was crossing at the time, and the pilot took the boat near to the post where the man had alighted, but the body had sunk from view.

The bridge watchman found the coat and vest of the suicide near the spot from which he jumped, and took them, together with a pine stick which the suicide had carried, to the Third district station, where, upon examining the pockets, a letter was found addressed to Nixon or Dixon, the initials torn off, by M. O. Brown, dealer in tobacco and cigars, at Pleasant Hills, Illinois.

A few hours after the tragic act, the body was found 400 yards below the bridge. It was then ascertained that the suicide was an old man sixty years of age, named George Hickson, who has lived some time in East St. Louis, and that he had resolved upon self-destruction on account of a domestic difficulty with his son-in-law, John Girard. Hickson traveled with Barnum's circus a long time, exhibiting his son, a noted dwarf.

Man Quits Tobacco on 91st Birthday

1920

Estimates He Has Taken 140,000 Chews of the Weed

ROME, N. Y. - "Uncle Ben" Hasser, who lives near here, has quit chewing tobacco - quit on his 91st birthday, which he celebrated last Saturday.

Uncle Ben says he commenced chewing the weed when he was 14 years old and has never missed a day without putting at least five chews in his mouth. He says he has been doing a little figuring and that during his life he must have taken 140,000 "chews."

He has now gone without his chew for five days and believes he is already weaned from the habit, "but a feller can't jest always tell," he says.


Lumbermen Nearly Saw a Bear In Two

HUBBARD LAKE, Mich. - Charles Noble and Sam Jackson of this village had a very unusual experience the other day when at work in a timber camp.

While sawing through the trunk of a large basswood tree they had just cut down, they came near sawing the body of a live, half-grown bear completely in twain.

As it was, they gave young bruin a slight cut with the saw and were amazed to see the shaggy black beast leap from a hollow in the log and scamper away, howling loud enough to stampede all other wild animals for miles around. Other witnesses vouch for this news story.

Dr. Z.V. Purdy, Logansport, Indiana, Nearly 104 Years Old

Riverdale, Illinois, 1915

NEARLY 104 YEARS OLD

Still Enjoys a "Shot" and a Chew of Tobacco

Dr. Z. V. Purdy, who resides near Logansport, Ind. returned home Wednesday after a five weeks visit with his son J. Purdy of Harvey. The doctor will be 104 years old if he lives until next March. He was born at Harper's Ferry Virginia, March 5, 1812. He practiced medicine for many years in Kentucky and Indiana before retiring some years ago. He is quite strong for one of his years; his mind is clear and his hearing and eyesight good. The scribe had the pleasure of quite a chat with the old gentleman last Wednesday morning while he was waiting for the Panhandle train at Riverdale. He was accompanied by his sons J. W. of Star City, Ind., and J. Purdy of Harvey. He served nearly six years in the army and carries a silver mounted cane presented to him by Gen. W. T. Sherman at the close of the war.

The doctor takes a little stimulant of whisky toddy about four times a day and always keeps his plug of tobacco handy and uses it frequently. He says he has never taken any great care of his health, but lives "one day like another" and expects to live for many years yet. He is still interested in current events but likes to talk of the old days and can remember dates very clearly.

The scribe has heard and read about people a hundred years old, but this was our first experience to meet and greet a person of that great age. Wonder how many of our subscribers know a man or woman 100 years old. Write us about it if you do.

—The Pointer, Riverdale, Illinois, December 24, 1915, page 1.

My Lady Nicotine — Curious Meditations on Smoking

1903

My Lady Nicotine

Curious Meditations Upon the Smoking Habit

There must be a great army of men who smoke an ounce of tobacco a day. Such worthy smokers are, of course, men of a philosophic and reflecting disposition, although they do not always care to favor the world with the results of the high meditations due to the influence of the soothing weed.

It will be new, even to many of these, to know that it would take no less than 9S years to dispose of a ton of tobacco at this rate of consumption, says Tit-Bits, and it will be still more surprising to consider the magnitude of this amount under various aspects.

The smoker of an ounce a day is almost invariably a faithful disciple of the pipe. He may submit to a cigar or a cigaret to please the ladies, but the pipe remains his true love. Hence we will first suppose that our ton of tobacco is to be sacrificed to My Lady Nicotine in the homely pipe. If the ordinary ounce packets in which the tobacco is probably bought were piled in a single column they would tower to a height of 2,700 feet. Arranged in a solid block they would form a cube of packed "shag" measuring 13 feet in every direction, or more than twice the height of a man.

We might conceive a pipe specially built to consume this mass. Such a pipe, if built on the plan of the familiar briar would be 100 feet long, and the bowl would be 20 feet in diameter. This bowl could accommodate 700 men. Should the smoker of such a huge pipeful prefer the "church warden" he would obtain a graceful clay 500 feet long.

On a low average two matches are used to each pipe of tobacco. After his 750,000 pipes the smoker would have used as many matches as would stretch from London to Coventry, or Bath or Gloucester, if placed end to end. The timber would be barely contained in a grove of 20 stalwart trees each 40 feet high. The heat energy represented, and which is largely water, would serve to run a locomotive a considerable distance.

We must not forgot that there are many who prefer the mild cigaret. Let us consider our ton of tobacco in this form. There will be a considerable difference in the actual number of cigarets consumed if the smoker makes his own in preference to buying them ready made. In the former case he will burn no fewer than 1,000,000 in fragrant smoke; a quantity which is placed in order would make a thin white line from London to Brighton, and in the latter case they would stretch for 37 miles. Placed side by side, they would pave a small pathway five miles long.

Could we make these cigarets into one huge whole, we should obtain a cigaret 10 feet in diameter and nearly 100 feet long. A man built in proportion to enjoy this little smoke would be a mere 2,220 feet high. The consumer of this tobacco may, like Svengali, be a lover of the big cigar of the Havana. If so, he must be prepared to spend at least £3,000, of which 500 pounds will be wasted in fag-ends.

Thrown Off By Brakeman and Had Hand Cut Off

NORFOLK, Neb., June 30.
—Special to The News.—
While stealing a ride on a freight train near West Point today, Anton Niedemeier, of Wisner, was ordered off by the brakeman, and he stubbed his toe and fell. His hand was run over and was amputated.

--Lincoln Evening News, Lincoln, Nebraska, June 30, 1905, page 1.


A Dog's Queer Taste.

"Old Peter Jenkins of our town has the only tobacco-chewing dog ever heard of," says a Bristol, Pa., man in the Philadelphia Record. "The dog is now over 10 years old, and, so far as anybody knows, he has been a slave to the habit ever since he was a puppy. Peter himself says he doesn't remember how the pup acquired the taste; maybe he was born with it. At any rate Peter never takes a chew without offering one to the dog if he is around, and the dog never refuses. If Peter should happen to forget he would soon be forcibly reminded of his oversight. It is a curious thing to see the dog lying with head in his paws, working his jaws over a juicy quid. He swallows it, too, and it never seems to make him sick."

--The Sioux County Bee, Rock Valley, Iowa, July 24, 1903, page 4.


A Mean Fellow.

Clara -- Of all mean, selfish, worldly, despicable creatures, I think Mr. Huggem is the worst.
Dora -- Why, what has he done?
Clara -- When I refused him he did not commit suicide, or go to a mountain cave, or anything. He's engaged to a girl I hate. -- New York Weekly.


A laugh is worth a hundred groans in any market. -- Charles Lamb.


Happy, Nevertheless

Oh, he was a trusted employe,
With a life in obscurity spent,
He found 'twas his lot
To be wholly forgot,
'Cause he never embezzled a cent.
--Washington Star.


Beethoven's mother was a stout, brisk, hard-working housewife, who seemed to have not a thought about her daily duties.

--The Sioux County Bee, Rock Valley, Iowa, July 24, 1903, page 4.

Met His Match

Alkali Ika -- They have just taken Roaring Bill to the hospital.
Pistol Pete -- What happened to him?
Alkali Ike -- He tried to break up a suffragist meeting. -- Judge.
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Chew and smoke untaxed tobacco, cheap and undoped. Meriwether & Edwards, Clarksville, Tenn.
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A man is seldom arrested for striking an attitude.

Comment: The tobacco ad in the middle is in smaller type.

--The Ellis Review Headlight, Ellis, Kansas, 1911