Changes in Weddings — Fewer Vows Made "To Obey"

1910

OMISSIONS AT THE ALTAR

Many Brides Who Now Refuse Make the Verbal Promise of Obedience

This year, as usual, some of the June brides got into the newspapers by refusing to make the verbal promise of obedience "till death us do part," as required by "The Form of Solemnization of Matrimony," specified in the Book of Common Prayer.

The full ceremony includes the exaction of a vow to "serve him," likewise, "so long as ye both shall live;" and it furthermore comprises several admonitions quoted from St. Paul and St. Peter, all to the one effect, wifely subjection. Any other point of view could hardly have been expected from spokesmen of the first century oriental community, particularly not from St. Peter, who himself was married, and who would, therefore, probably not have wished to upset an ancient, popular tradition no less convenient for his sex — than venerable.

Despite the eastern origin of its faith, the Christian world has managed to de-orientalize itself a good deal in nineteen hundred years, and the flavor of orientalism, which, quite naturally, attaches to the "Solemnization of Matrimony," is not now entirely to the taste of all western women — or men. But aren't the fair modern occidental Protestants rather illogical? They refuse to promise "to obey" a man for a single minute, although obedience is purely an act of volition, not requiring the smallest regard or respect for the person obeyed, or even acquaintance with him. On the other hand, the brides find it easy to swear "to love" a man forever, although love is a thing completely beyond control of the will!

Deign, if you please, Mesdames les Divorcees and others, to acknowledge that the great fundamental reason of marital discord, infelicity and wreck is the cessation of that feeling "to love," whose perpetual continuance it appears so very easy to pledge. Moreover, nobody ever alleges post-nuptial disinclination or even refusal "to obey" as a sufficient provocation for divorce. Of those two covenants, why object to the lightest? — Collier's.