Get Wise: Little Nuggets of Wisdom

Bedford, Pennsylvania, 1920

Trading a peck of trouble for a pint of whisky is a poor bargain.

The poor fellows whose thirst for whisky in Massachusetts brought them to their grave will not trust their fellow-man any longer. They've handed in their checks.

If you are the architect of fortune don't build too many castles in the air.

If you have to hit a man on the head to make him see a joke, hit him so hard that he will never see another one.

Nobody is so blind as he who refuses to see through other people.

It is well to make well rounded periods in making a speech. In fact some could devote all their time to punctuation and omit words. Everybody would be better pleased.

In these days the fellow who shoots off his mouth about prohibition isn't apt to be loaded.

When blushing, modesty gets so flustered it doesn't know which way to turn, it simply turns red.

Procrastination is the thief of time. Insomnia, is never ready to say goodbye till the alarm clock is ready to go off.

It is polite now to tell a whole country to 'dry up".

The report that the world would come to an end on December 17, caused some little stir in Bedford. However Mrs. Pedro Helwanger and some of her neighbors got consolation from the fact that if it did end they would get rid of Pedro. After Pedro learned of this conspiracy he was glad it did not come as he likes to get ahead of his wife and neighbors.

—Bedford Gazette, Bedford, Pennsylvania, January 2, 1920, page 5.