A Lesson In Spelling

1895

She (at the desk) — Dear, please tell me how to spell costume. I'm writing to mother about my lovely new gown.
He — Well, are you ready?
She — Yes.
He — C-o-s-t, cost.
She — Yes.
He — T-o, to.
She — Well?
He — M-e, me — 65, as yet unpaid.
She — You're a wretch! — Frank Harrison's Magazine.


Just Like Him

"Oh, Clara, see this deliciously ugly Japanese god Arthur gave me for a birthday present!"
"Oh, isn't it exquisitely horrible! Just like him, isn't it?" — New York Recorder.