Thursday, August 21, 2008

Fooled His Landlady

1895

Young Millingham's Heavy Correspondence Paid His Board For a Week.

There is more than one way of beguiling a landlady.

Mrs. Sunday, who keeps a very excellent establishment in Forty-third street, grew suspicious of young Millingham, one of her boarders. He had for three weeks neglected the trifling formality of paying her any money, and she had prepared to speak to him about it Saturday morning.

But he saw the resolution written in her face and escaped. In the afternoon he sent the following advertisement to a morning paper:

"Wanted — Man of from 20 to 30 years of age can secure employment at good wages by addressing M. Millingham, No. — Forty-third street; no peddling; no personal applications considered."

He managed to get in at an hour when Mrs. Sunday was out of his way and comfortably abed. At the breakfast table, where he appeared fairly radiant in smiles of assurance, he confided to his neighbor, though for the evident benefit of his landlady, that half a dozen men had called on him the previous afternoon for his new formula.

"Formula for what?" asked the neighbor.

But he intrenched himself in mystery, and only assured him that he had "caught the town."

At 9 o'clock two letters came for him. At 1 there were half a dozen. By night he had received two dozen. And the landlady, whose frowns had been black as Egypt in the morning, began to look upon him as a person of note.

She said nothing about his board bill Monday morning, though he bearded her boldly in the hall and told her to take care of any letters that might come for him.

There was an armful of them in the evening, and Mrs. Sunday was more than gracious to him. Tuesday he told her he had used up all his materials, and borrowed $10 of her to purchase a new supply. Wednesday she told the other boarders she was surprised that none of them had Mr. Millingham's business ability.

And then one of them, in self defense, turned up that advertisement. So that if Millingham ever does go back to Mrs. Sunday's boarding house he will learn her opinion of a man who does business on a capital of false pretenses. — New York Herald.

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