Friday, August 29, 2008

New at the Business.

1895

Scene in a dry goods store which has lately added a cigar department:

Salesman (transferred from linen stock, to customer, an old smoker, — Ah, good morning, sir! What can I show you today? Here are some lovely Henry Clay perfectos — from the same house, sir, that sends us the Clay worsteds, which you will find at the cloth counter.

(Customer looks surprised.)

"Yes, sir, and just look at this pretty bunch of imported Manila cheroots! We have them in all shades and sizes, sir. And the ribbon around this bunch exactly matches your four-in-hand."

(Customer glares.)

"Or perhaps you would like this sweet meerschaum pipe? It is warranted not to change color or show smoke marks."

(Customer gets red in the face.)

"Chewing tobacco, sir? Yes, sir. Will you have a yard or two yards?"

(Customer explodes into violent language and salesman faints.) — Buffalo Express.

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