Athenian Levity In Small Bits

1895

There is one of the fixed stars that is so badly fixed as to be 100,000,000,000 miles distant from the sun. This is really Sirius.

The 5 cent eating houses were not a success in Boston. A cup of coffee and a piece of pie must cost at least 7 cents to attract the independent poor of our luxurious era.

No wonder that a large audience gathers to hear a lecture on "Darkest Turkey." That is the choicest part of the bird. — Boston Transcript.



Washington's Birthday

The first known celebration of Washington's birthday was on Feb. 11, 1784. The old style date was still adhered to. This was during the lifetime of the first president and completed his fifty-third year. The following is from the Pennsylvania Packet of Philadelphia of the date of Tuesday, Feb. 17, 1784:

"NEW YORK [Friday], Feb. 13. — Wednesday last being the birthday of his excellency General Washington the same was celebrated by all the true friends of American independence and constitutional liberty with that hilarity and manly decorum ever attendant on the sons of freedom. In the evening an entertainment was given on board the East India ship in this harbor to a very brilliant and respectable company, and a discharge of 13 cannon was fired on the joyful occasion." The observance of the day was not confined to New York city. — Chicago Inter Ocean.



A Difficult World

Bobby — There isn't any telling what to do in this world.
Tottie — Wot's ze matter?
Bobby — Mamma is always makin me eat things I don't like 'cause they is good for me, so today I said I didn't care for puddin, and instead of makin me eat a hull lot she didn't offer me any. — Good News.